Introducing a new baby into a home with existing pets can be a heartwarming experience, but it often comes with unique challenges, especially when your furry companions have specific anxieties. This is The Story Of Your Dog and baby, as shared by Michelle, a highly sought-after dog trainer and a mom to a 4-year-old girl, two dogs, and one cat. Her firsthand account offers invaluable insights, practical strategies, and a dose of much-needed hope for parents navigating this significant transition.
Michelle’s fur babies, Izzy and Frankie, each presented their own set of quirks. Izzy, while friendly with adults, was notably nervous around younger children, often barking if they came too close. Frankie, on the other hand, was generally neutral towards kids but became anxious around adult strangers who approached too quickly, leading to barking if they loomed or tried to pet her. Understanding these individual temperaments was the first step in Michelle’s meticulous preparation. the great dog story highlights that every dog has a unique background that shapes their reactions and behaviors, especially when faced with new situations like a baby joining the family. Michelle’s journey provides a detailed roadmap for managing these anxieties and fostering a positive, safe environment for both children and pets.
Disclaimer: If your dog has displayed aggressive behaviors toward children, it is crucial to seek immediate guidance from a certified dog trainer or a veterinary behaviorist to ensure everyone’s safety.
Preparing for Parenthood: The Pregnancy Phase
Michelle’s proactive approach began during her second trimester, focusing on laying a strong foundation even before her baby arrived. Her initial efforts concentrated on gradually separating herself from her dogs while at home, intentionally ignoring them for short periods. This practice helped them become more independent and less reliant on her constant attention, preparing them for a time when her focus would naturally shift towards the newborn.
Simultaneously, Michelle worked on habituating her dogs to various baby equipment and sounds. This included setting up the crib, stroller, and other baby gear, allowing her dogs to explore these new objects in a low-pressure environment. She also played recordings of baby sounds—cries, coos, and babbles—at low volumes, gradually increasing the intensity. This desensitization process aimed to make these novel stimuli less alarming and more normalized for Izzy and Frankie, ensuring they wouldn’t be startled when the actual baby came home.
Welcoming the Baby Home: Early Introductions
The moment of bringing her newborn home was carefully orchestrated. Michelle consistently positioned her body as a gentle barrier between her dogs and the baby, creating a protective space without making the dogs feel excluded. Her strategy involved teaching the dogs to maintain distance, often by prompting them to lie on their beds or on the opposite end of the couch. This approach reassured them that they were still part of the family while establishing clear boundaries regarding the baby’s personal space.
Initially, Izzy, the dog nervous around kids, showed conflicted body language, wanting to investigate but also displaying signs of anxiety. Michelle managed this by ensuring Izzy kept her distance, only allowing brief sniffs near the baby’s feet once Izzy exhibited calm behavior. Crucially, Izzy was never permitted near the baby’s head or face. This nervous dog also tended to be very clingy, so Michelle carefully taught her to give space, especially when the baby was present. Over time, Izzy grew accustomed to the baby’s presence, though she would become agitated if the baby screamed, frantically seeking Michelle’s attention.
Frankie, who was neutral to children, naturally kept her distance, often choosing to leave the room if she felt unsure or uncomfortable. Michelle consistently praised Frankie for this self-regulation, reinforcing that taking space was a positive behavior. This allowed Frankie to manage her own comfort levels effectively.
Michelle’s key actions during this period included:
- Always having the dogs follow her when leaving the room, ensuring they were never left alone with the baby.
- Frequently physically separating the dogs and providing them with enriching activities like stuffed Kongs and treats given at a distance.
- Practicing physical separation even when the baby was immobile, in preparation for the crawling stage.
The Crawling Stage: Increased Vigilance
As soon as the baby began to move, Michelle observed a noticeable shift in her dogs’ behavior. Both Izzy and Frankie became more alert and quite nervous. Frankie, the neutral dog, continued her excellent self-management by choosing to leave the room whenever the baby started crawling towards her, a behavior Michelle consistently encouraged.
Izzy, however, reacted differently. The nervous dog would watch the baby like a hawk, but unlike Frankie, she wouldn’t move away on her own, even when clearly worried. Michelle had to actively prompt Izzy to go to a designated “away” spot or another room. Despite her intense anxiety, Izzy seemed to freeze, allowing the uncomfortable situation to continue until it became overwhelming for her, necessitating Michelle’s intervention.
A dog in a protective bubble, representing the need for personal space
During this phase, Michelle significantly increased her management strategies:
- She used more physical separation, installing additional baby gates and fences to create safe zones.
- A playpen became an essential tool for the baby, providing a secure space where she could explore without direct dog interaction.
- Michelle began to teach her baby about giving dogs space and not touching them, consistently blocking or redirecting any attempts. Reading dr seuss dog book together provided an engaging way to introduce concepts of animal interaction.
- She modeled appropriate interactions, such as waving hello or hugging one of the baby’s soft stuffed animals, to demonstrate respectful engagement from a distance.
- Crucially, once the baby started moving, Michelle never gave her dogs food, toys, or chews in the same space as her child, preventing potential resource guarding issues.
The Challenging Toddler Years: Walking and Independence
Michelle describes the period when her baby began walking, roughly from 1 year to 18 months old, as the “HARDEST time” for their family. Her daughter was an early walker, characterized by fearlessness and a highly physical nature. During this intense phase, dogs and baby were separated approximately 90% of the time.
When they were together, Michelle’s supervision was absolute. She dedicated her entire attention to managing their interactions, literally practicing their coexistence in the same space. The dogs were visibly nervous due to the baby’s unpredictable movements and wobbly gait, which made them feel vulnerable.
Michelle’s consistent actions included:
- Continually reminding her daughter not to move toward the dogs and emphasizing their need for space.
- Physically blocking and redirecting her daughter repeatedly whenever she attempted to approach the dogs.
- If her daughter persisted, Michelle would physically separate them immediately.
- She offered abundant praise when her daughter self-interrupted her attempts to approach the dogs, chose to do something else, or simply looked at them from a distance. Michelle particularly valued moments when her daughter became bored enough to ignore the dogs and play with her own toys.
- She closely monitored the dogs’ comfort levels, lavishing them with praise for remaining calm and relaxed in her daughter’s presence.
Building a Relationship: 18 Months to 2 Years
Over time, Michelle observed a gradual but significant change: her dogs became increasingly relaxed and accustomed to her daughter’s movements. Because Michelle had meticulously protected them and advocated for their space, they learned that the child was not a threat, but rather a predictable part of their environment. Around 18 months, she cautiously introduced supervised treat-giving, allowing her daughter to offer treats like goldfish crackers. This choice was deliberate, as these treats were safe for her daughter to eat in case she accidentally put them in her own mouth.
A non-negotiable rule was established and reinforced: once the dog was near or had a treat or food, her daughter was never to approach them. This taught respect for the dog’s space and resources. Around this age, Michelle also began teaching her daughter how to play fetch with the dogs. This proved especially rewarding for Frankie, the dog who was neutral toward children, as playing with toys was a highly motivating activity for her. This period, characterized by giving treats, playing fetch, and ensuring only positive experiences with the child, was crucial in helping the dogs relax and begin to build their unique relationships with Michelle’s daughter.
Michelle also started introducing key concepts to her child. One effective strategy was teaching the idea of animals being in a “bubble”—a personal space that we never enter unless invited. This visual concept, especially appealing to her daughter who loved actual bubbles, provided a concrete understanding of respecting boundaries. It was rewarding to hear her daughter often remind Michelle that the cat or dog was in their bubble. Additionally, Michelle began to talk extensively about dog body language, pointing out what signs indicated a dog wanted to play versus needing space, or if they were happy or nervous. Learning to recognize these cues helped her daughter understand when she was being invited into the “bubble.” Shared family activities, such as trips to the beach or park, further strengthened these positive associations by creating fun experiences outdoors for everyone, including clifford the big red dog book online which could be read together.
Two Years Old: Looser Supervision and Affection
By the time Michelle’s daughter turned two, a new equilibrium had been established. The dogs and the child were accustomed to sharing their space and adhering to the household rules Michelle had painstakingly put in place. As a result, issues were rare, and her daughter no longer attempted to grab or pester the dogs.
A heartwarming development was the transformation of Frankie, the dog who started out neutral toward children. She became genuinely fond of Michelle’s daughter, often initiating play sessions and frequently asking for physical affection. Michelle began to practice the rules of gentle touching, teaching her daughter how to give a soft pet on Frankie’s back, limiting this interaction to Frankie only at first.
Michelle continued her management strategies, albeit with slightly more flexibility:
- She physically separated the dogs and child if her daughter was particularly energetic, running wildly, using a toy with wheels, or in a mood prone to tantrums or pushing boundaries.
- While still supervising, Michelle could now multitask, keeping a watchful eye on their interactions rather than dedicating her entire attention solely to them.
Two and a Half Years Old: Seeking Attention and New Responsibilities
A significant milestone occurred when Izzy, the dog who had initially been nervous around children, started actively seeking out attention from Michelle’s daughter. This was a testament to the consistent positive experiences and careful management that had slowly eroded Izzy’s anxieties.
A dog and a baby interacting gently, showing a developing positive relationship
Michelle’s daughter, in turn, learned how to gently pet the dogs and where, always under adult supervision and only after asking permission. Play became a more frequent and integrated part of their daily lives. They also introduced new responsibilities, such as allowing her daughter to share holding the leash during secure walks and helping to hold the dogs’ harnesses before they were put on, fostering a sense of participation and care for the pets. Reading dog man books you can read could also reinforce positive associations with dogs in children’s literature.
It was truly a remarkable transformation to witness Frankie’s deepening affection for her daughter and Izzy’s gradual warming up to her presence, evolving from apprehension to actively seeking interaction.
Three to Four Years Old: Strong Bonds and Increased Responsibility
After her daughter turned 2.5, and especially from the age of three onwards, the bond between the child and the dogs became incredibly strong and evident. Michelle could now supervise their interactions more loosely, moving in and out of the room confidently. Both dogs frequently approached her daughter, initiating requests for physical affection, which her daughter could now provide gently and appropriately. They enjoyed sitting by her when she watched TV and often sought to join her in her bedroom during quiet activities like reading or playing calmly.
Michelle’s daughter’s involvement in dog care also increased significantly. She joyfully helped feed the dogs their meals daily (under supervision), dropping kibble into their puzzle bowls, asking the dogs to “sit” and “wait,” then setting the bowl down and releasing them with an “okay.” (Important note: the bowls were always put away when not in use). They also allowed her to give low-value chewies. With a cup of treats on the table, she loved to play “dog trainer just like mommy,” practicing rewarding them for “Sit,” “Down,” “Spin,” “Stay,” and “Come.”
Fetch remained a favorite activity, both at home and outdoors. Trips to the beach often included her daughter and the dogs running together, with her daughter throwing the ball for them to retrieve. Michelle notes that her small dogs don’t jump or herd, so knocking her daughter down was not a concern, but advised caution for owners of larger dogs. The bond was so profound that her daughter would express sadness when the dogs were left at home for outings to places like playgrounds.
An additional testament to their success was the dogs’ newfound comfort around her daughter’s best friend. This was achieved through careful, gradual exposure over many playdates, always separating the dogs initially when a new child was present. Now, both dogs can calmly coexist while the two children play in the house.
Ongoing Management and Key Takeaways
Even with a strong bond, Michelle maintained consistent management strategies to ensure continued harmony:
- Physical separation was still implemented when her child was being particularly wild, running and jumping, or having difficulty controlling her body during play.
- Dogs were separated when her child used toys with wheels, such as a scooter or balance bike, indoors.
- During the 3-4 year old phase, characterized by more explosive tantrums and boundary testing, dogs were separated anytime her daughter was defiant or seemed unable to control herself around them.
- When her daughter’s best friend was over, separation occurred if their play became wild or involved chasing games.
- Michelle also managed situations where the dogs sought attention from her daughter, quickly calling them away and separating them if they couldn’t give her daughter space.
- Although her daughter helped with treats and meals, all these activities remained closely supervised, and high-value chewies or puzzle toys were still given to dogs in separate spaces.
- Despite the dogs’ love for tug-of-war, Michelle recognized it was too advanced a game for a small child to play safely with a dog, so it was avoided.
If the story of your dog interacting with your children makes you anxious, Michelle’s journey offers a wealth of tangible ideas and, most importantly, hope. Her experience powerfully demonstrates the ease that well-trained dogs bring to life with kids.
For those feeling stressed about their dog’s adjustment to a new baby, Michelle offers comprehensive training courses. The Preparation Course provides step-by-step guidance and tools for training and management throughout the Dog Meets Baby journey, including a dedicated module for dogs nervous around children. For the crucial first introduction, the First Meeting Course offers a detailed plan and the invaluable feeling of being prepared. These courses are also available as a popular Bundle.
